A few years ago I was working on a book that took me to the west coast and parts of the Midwest to talk to people in the community resilience movement. I wrote a book proposal and shopped it around and had some mild interest from literary agents. I received a grant for research travel, and I was selected a trio of writing residencies, and I wrote a bunch of words.
I still have those words. Some of them have turned up in posts here and other places. (People seem consistently most intrigued by the Mudgirls natural building collective.) But I have yet to use them in some final-final form of Thrivalists. Every agent who loved the topic ended up declining because of my “thin platform.” They didn’t believe that I would garner enough readership, in other words, to make me worth the risk.
I began to disbelieve it myself. I added that to a bone-deep doubt that anything I could do would ever be good enough or come together coherently enough to produce a book.
I shelved the project, and began to work on another, supposedly interim, nonfiction book. It was supposed to be a six-month jaunt into something different-but-related: I would write of my own healing journey, and how it connected to the buried ruins of a 19th century women’s mental institution (“Seven Steeples”) where I was volunteering at a modern-day farm.
Two and a half years later…
Still working on that one. And I received a grant this year to further the project, which feels great! but also kind of heavy and dubious, since the first grant did not (yet) result in publication.
Next month I will hand my manuscript to a professional for editing services, thanks to the Indiana Arts Commission’s generosity.
In the meantime (while still freelancing in the farm profile arena) I periodically send out pieces of each work-in-progress to see if anyone is interested in publishing them as essays. Nope nope nope. (Though I’ve had a few very nice rejection notes!)
Till this month. To meet a shorter word count and fit a theme of “Roots,” I reworked a segment of Thrivalists about the role of fungi in rootedness. I incorporated some newer, slightly woo-woo material (sort of a mashup of both projects), and sent it to Topology Magazine. They published The Gift of the Fungi, which is ostensibly about what I learned at the Radical Mycology Convergence, but is also about coming to embrace a wider sense of possibility.
I felt a curious lack of enthusiasm for the news that the site would publish it. The old “any club that would have me as a member” dilemma? A sense that I could have snagged a higher profile outlet, if I’d persisted? Some of each.
Plus a sense of : “I went to California, British Columbia, Washington, Oregon, Illinois and Ohio and all I got was this lousy T-shirt?”
The end product is supposed to be a book, not a little online article.
Well, then a writing buddy reminded me of something Charles Eisenstein asked in a podcast : Would you write even if you had only one reader, even if you knew that that reader might take your words and change the world… but you’d never get credit for it? He wrote a piece about how this type of loyalty test first arose for him. An excellent read if you have time.
Why do we do what we do? What is our ultimate goal? If it’s about fulfilling our purpose, taking our place in the Divine scheme of things, then words like “platform” and “readership” are less important than resonating our truth.
In the world we live in, money and fame are gods. What we have to offer doesn’t count unless it brings in income or gains huge exposure. Charles and my writing buddy and I refute that story, and I suspect we’re not alone in that.
Oh and by the way, some ideas are percolating about that old project as I hit the home stretch (?) of the new one. I haven’t seen the last of the inspiring Thrivalists that shared with me. I can tell because of the way my blood hums when I think of putting their stories in a wider frame.
Maybe I just needed to expand (not my platform but my being) before I could put the work out there. We’ll see.
Got my interest so now I am waiting to read Chapter 2!!!!! Not really into the stimuli gained for your beginning, but the development that is happening now. My concerns are always presenting way too many questions, ideas and what next to look forward to experiencing, learning, seeking, etc. This morning as I was out to get the Indy Star from the drive way, the Cotton Wood trees were having the seizure of the leaves moving and making a sound that always makes me wonder “what could cause this movement when no other tree is into this”? So off we go to discover ourselves and the many experiences of living!
I love cottonwoods! Enjoy your discoveries.
Best to you Shawndra as you continue to think and write and let the ideas percolate to fruition.
Sent from my iPad
I respect you and the change your writing brings about in people. I often read books in my local library and am always looking for good books to read. The pictures you took have a beauty that clearly depicts the message you are describing. I liked all the pictures you showed like of the two children sawing a branch at the home schooling cooperative. I am curious about your healing journey as you call it as I myself have had some difficulty with illness.
I am so touched by your comment.
Thank you so much, my friend!
Thank you for not responding to your lack of platform by developing apps, posting a dozen daily selfies on various social media outlets, and inserting emojis into your blog posts. I am charmed and enthralled by the lyrical nature and content of your writing. Perhaps you will be the one who leads us back to an appreciation of solid literature instead of fluff.
My goodness, what a lovely comment. Thank you so much! May it be so.